Anger Management Facilitator Guide

Introduction

There's an old saying that goes "Those who can, do; those who can't, teach." I tell this to my anger management classes within the first few minutes. It never fails to get a chuckle or two. The biggest reward for me in teaching anger management is that I learn anger management. Teaching class leaves me with interesting stories, opportunities to learn from the mistakes of others, but mostly, it reinforces what I already know and helps me to transform my own life.

George Anderson has compiled an amazing array of exercises, explanations, and techniques for learning to control anger. His workbooks nearly teach themselves. If anger management were only a matter of book learning, no class or teacher would be needed—everybody could subscribe to the home study course. But anger management involves re-socialization—a deep reprogramming of how to respond to frustration, stress, and feeling helpless. This transformation requires three ingredients: 1) knowledge, which is provided in the workbooks, 2) community—a safe place to practice, which is provided in the classes, and 3) time to let the mind integrate the entire experience.

In order for all these to work together, the magic touch of an anger management teacher is required. I say "magic," because teaching anger management is an exercise in the art of learning to change consciousness at will—a traditional definition of magic. Preprogrammed video tapes won't do it. Computer based learning won't do it. We learned to be angry in the unconscious crucible of our childhood families; learning to manage that anger happens in the conscious community of a class—and a consciousness that reflects on the process will only develop when guided by somebody who knows the process from personal experience.

There are as many ways to teach these classes as there are teachers. Some teachers (and the demands of some environments) never allow any personal experiences to intrude into the class. I cannot teach without telling stories about how I "lost it" as well as stories illustrating how I managed my anger. I find that by sharing my humanity to illustrate the occasional point, I bond more tightly with my class and the class members are more likely to share honestly and learn from the heart. But this is my style; it is certainly not required by the text.

This process demands fidelity to the text. Take the words on the page, make them yours. Encourage your students to share about how they have experienced the concepts in the class. If the sharing gets too far a field, come back to one of the anchors and continue with the material. That is perhaps the greatest genius of this approach—the four anchors provide a "lost and found" point to which almost any detour can be rerouted, bringing the class back to task and transforming even highly tangential stories into powerful learning experiences. With the four anchors, a teacher need never "lose control" of the class.

Read everything you can about anger and anger management. Don't be afraid to augment class with the material when it fits with what's in the book. It can spice things up and inspire your students. Personally, I love bringing in the physiological effects of anger—it really gets the students' attention when they find out that being persistently angry does as much damage as smoking a pack of cigarettes each day!

Does this process work? You bet it does! It works on at least three levels. It works to transform the teacher. All of us could stand to improve our anger management skills, and teaching them over and over gives you the opportunity to engage yourself in the same change you hope that your students get. On another level, anger management classes work to improve physical health. Studies of heart patients have found a lower incidence of second heart attacks in those who took anger management classes than in those who only practiced relaxation. And finally, studies of cognitively based anger management classes¹ have found that they drastically decrease the anger level of students.

John Elder, MA, CAMF
Diplomate, AAAMP
Anderson & Anderson